Friday, April 24, 2009

how to enjoy being stuck in traffic for an hour

1. Get stuck at night, on your way home from somewhere. For instance, let's say you go grocery shopping. You didn't want to go grocery shopping, but your life is such that grocery shopping is one of the only things you do that offers you a break from work and family life. Getting stuck in this instance means that your break is longer.

2. Get stuck somewhere close to a business that operates one of those insanely high-powered spotlights, so that you'll have something to look at through your moon roof (because the moon itself, as well as any stars, is not visible).

3. Plug your MP3 player into your car stereo and turn it up loud. Really loud.

4. Turn off your engine and your headlights (because yes, you have been stuck for that long).

5. Pretend you are at an all-star laser light show featuring Drive-By Truckers, Neil Young, REM, John Lennon, Nina Simone, and some world music folks whose names you can neither spell nor pronounce.

6. Do not think about the food that is melting in your trunk.

7 comments:

Lythrum said...

I hear you, I used to live in the DC area so I spent a lot of time staring at the tail-lights in front of me. Thankfully now that I live in Northern AL I rarely have to deal with it. Hmmm, maybe I should go knock on something. :)

countrypeapie said...

Hi Lythrum ~ DC is one of my favorite places. It's so pretty, and it seems as though there's always so much going on outdoors. Plus, there's the Library of Congress and the Smithsonian -- and roundabouts, of course!

Once a week, I venture to the slightly less lovely architectural monuments in Gardendale, AL to buy groceries. I got stuck on I65N on my way home, just outside of Warrior. I never did see what happened. And I never could figure out which business would have one of those crazy-bright spotlights just outside of Warrior.

Lythrum said...

I loved the area, hated the traffic. :) I hate it when you get stuck in traffic but don't get to see the cause...I don't want to see carnage, but at least if you can see what happened it doesn't all seem for naught. :)

Journey2thepast said...

This made me laugh out loud because I could so picture you in this scenario! Way to keep it all in perspective!

countrypeapie said...

Lythrum, yeah, I know what you mean. It's crazy to be stuck for that long and then -- nothing!

Hey HB ~ I've never experienced a traffic jam quite like it. Everyone ended up turning their cars and their lights off, and people were getting out of their cars and standing in the middle of the Interstate, smoking cigarettes. It was an event!

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